Going For the Gold, A Creative Retreat To Tackle the Inner Critic

December 21, 2009

swimming-in-the-darkEureka Moment
when the lightbulb goes off

It is that time of the year and I am going on creative retreat.  I had a Eureka moment this weekend in which I realized that I never truly get traction on the bigger projects in my life.

WHY NOT?? I asked myself.  And I had a revelation about it.

I realized that even though I am NLP Trainer and a master Hypnotherapist, I  don’t know how to control my own brain!

Yes I know how, and I do this very successfully for my own clients, but I don’t access this power fully for myself.

WHY NOT?

Actually it is MUCH harder to do for yourself.  At least on a regular, reliable and consistent basis.  So that is my quest.  To find a way to do this for myself - a way that works anyone, anytime and for anyone.  That is my goal, and if it works on me than I will share it with you and everyone….

and if it doesn’t, then I will die trying!

inner-criticThis is a big one.  I can feel my inner critic pulling out all the punches already and I’ve barely even gotten started!  I know they may sound completely ridiculous to you, especially to those of you who know me, but trust me she’s got a LOUD voice and she knows how to hit right where it hurts.  Try to hear these critiques in the acid-dripping tone in which she delivers them.  Then maybe you’ll know what I mean.

Here is the list of her  top three hard hitters:

  1. “Haven’t you tried this before?”  You do have a whole set of notebooks filled with other great ideas don’t you?”
  2. “What are you doing this for?  Haven’t things like this already been done?”
  3. “Who is going to want this anyway?  You’re going to go to all of this trouble….and for what?”

As I said, she really knows how to hit where it hurts. She knows that I do have a cabinet of notebooks filled with my millions of great ideas.  She knows that what I am working on is not rocket science and is in fact very simple.  And worst of all she knows that my deepest fear (and everyone’s) is that all of our hard work and effort will be for nothing.

The biggest fear is that NO ONE CARES!

bag-of-tricksBut HA! Don’t worry folks, I have the tricks and the tools to handle this.  At least I hope I do.  Here’s how it’s gonna work - as she throws me a hard ball, I will devise a creative process to work with that.  So bring it on inner critic! I’m ready for you.  (I know I’m gonna be sorry I said this!)

I am going to let myself be wrestled to the ground, strangled by her acerbic words and brought to the edge of giving up.  This is my test.  Can I do it?  Can I face all of my foibles, failures and fears of inadequacy?

The fun is that I may die trying.  Not literally but figuratively.  Part of me will die, the part that has been afraid all along.

It’s much easier to pay someone to change your mind.  That is what my clients do every week and they get great changes.  I’m going to do it the hard way.  It’s just going to be me, myself, my inner critic and my journal.  Plus my bag of creative tricks that I’m going to use to tackle this problem.

If I can’t do it, maybe no one can.  I don’t mean that in an egotistical way.  I mean that if I, who has all of the tricks of the trade, can’t do it for myself, then maybe it’s time to find  a way that it CAN be done.

I want to create a reliable and repeatable process that can be used anytime, anywhere.  No more muse!  The inspiration has to come when I call it, not just show up when it wants to!  That’s too fickle for my purposes.

love-me-foreverSo this my goal for my creative retreat.  I will be back with the results in the new year.  Promise to love me no matter what happens.  Promise to stand by me whether I produce something or not.

Please admire for me just for going for it! I would really appreciate that.

I appreciate you already, for being here every week reading my blog.  Thank you from my heart.  Stay tuned for more in the new year.   Anything good that comes my way, will be naturally passed on to you.

Happy New Year my friends….here’s to renewed Light in your life.

Yours in the creative incubator of life,

Annie

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Posted by anniehart | Filed Under Creativity, Featured Story 

Comments

2 Responses to “Going For the Gold, A Creative Retreat To Tackle the Inner Critic”

  1. Beth Weisberg on December 25th, 2009 10:04 pm

    Can’t wait to hear how it went, Annie. My money’s on you to wrestle that inner critic to the ground! This really hit home for me (and for many others as well, I’m sure) — all those wonderful plans & ideas that don’t quite make it to fruition, plus all those wonderful gems of advice we pass along to others yet don’t seem to incorporate for ourselves. You go, girl: beat that nasty inner critic girl at her own game!

  2. elizabeth on December 28th, 2009 3:34 pm

    Hey Annie,
    Leave it to you to come up with this idea. I love it and it has got me thinking about how I can do one! My admiration is pointing in your direction!
    Happy New Year my friend. Somehow I think you are going to have one!
    elizabeth

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