Video: Chocolate is a Vegetable

March 7, 2010


[Post to Twitter] Tweet This Post 

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

Miracle Pants Story Part 2: “Fashion Fore-Warned”

February 8, 2010

buying-pantsI have very disappointing news folks.  For those of you that read my story about the Miracle Pants my mother wanted to send  - heartbreaking news is that they don’t come in my size!

I can hear you all shrieking, “OH NO,” right now as I did when I called the company and found out that even though they have petites, they don’t have a size 4 which is what I’d need.  They begin at a size 8.  I guess they don’t consider that fashion forward women like me can be tiny and on the cutting fashion edge at the same time.   Bummer!

This means that a lot of my Miracle Pants plans have to change.  Here’s where I won’t be able to do wearing my Miracle Pants:

  1. I won’t be wearing them to my niece’s college graduation, complete with high heeled lavender pumps.  *She is thrilled about this.
  2. I won’t be co-staring in the next Charlies Angels movie with my flame proof Miracle Pants.  I guess they are going to have to find someone else.
  3. I won’t be trekking the Great Wall of China in my hiking boots and Miracle Pants.  I’m sure this would have been a first.
  4. And saddest of all is that on my next date, whenever that is, I will not be flirting with the love of my life in my Miracle Pants. (sob, sob, sob)

I know you’re all saddened to the core about this but don’t let it get you down.  The good news is that if you’re a size 8 or larger, petite or otherwise - YOU can get the Miracle Pants.  Just email me and I will personally send you an autographed copy of the ad and you can be well on your way to Miracle Pant heaven.haband-ponte-knit-pants

Before I end this sad story however, I know there are a few things that you were wondering about.  You are certainly dying to know which colors I was going to order??  I had picked out sensible black, vibrant violent, charming turquoise and little bunny pink.  All wonderful colors don’t you think?

You are probably also wondering, as my niece was when she said, “Annie what the heck are you going to do in these pants?”   “Sweetie,” I answered, “I am going to go on dates, fly to Paris, walk down the street and wear them to your graduation.”

She was horrified by all of the above options.  But as I said, unfortunately none of these Miracle Pant adventures will come to fruition, now or ever.  (Sob, sob).  Excuse me I’ve got to go get a tissue…..

Here’s the last thing you were wondering - what else could I have used these pants for?  Well here are some comments from my loyal blog readers about the pants:

“Chuck Norris couldn’t rip those pants.”

“I bet they ward off wild animals and vampires too.”

“You are so funny!  I’m still laughing.  I could use some miracle pants!  Pink and purple would be nice. People will see me coming when I ask them to volunteer.”

i-hate-pantsWell folks in lieu of wearing the miracle pants, I guess I’ll have to be adventurous in another way.

You’ve been fashion fore-warned.  Today go out and get yourself a pair of flame proof pants and live a little dangerously!

Yours in always sharing a side of life that is better kept hidden,

Annie

[Post to Twitter] Tweet This Post 

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

The Story of the Miracle Pants

January 25, 2010

mer-gina-and-sweetieMy mother is adorable.  At 90 years old she still lives in an old fashioned world of no cell phones, no email and $5 pairs of pants.

She called me the other day very excited.  I hate to say this but usually when she is excited about something for me it’s often something that I dread.  Her tastes and mine are often very different.

As a kid she would take me to buy new shoes and when we got to the store she’d say to me, “Go ahead and pick out the ones that you like.”  As soon as I would pick out the coolest, hippest pair of shoes that an 8-year old could find, she’d say, “Oh not those.  We’re going to get these sturdy brown ones.”  You know the sensible kind? Ugh! My mother’s taste in shoes and mine were radically different.shoes

So when she called me the other day very excited to say that she wanted to buy me some pants, I had a moment of excitement until I realized that ‘Ugh’, they might be a lot like the brown shoes of the past.

But my mother is 90 now and I decided that I don’t have to ward off her clothing choices anymore.  I can open to them and share her excitement, whether I want the pants or not.  So I called her back.

pant-pile-2She was just dying to tell me about these amazing $5 polyester knit pants that come in so many exciting colors and are completely spill proof.  She knows this because she spilled her breakfast all over them and was able to wash them right out in the sink and they didn’t even leave a stain.  Wow, these really are miracle pants.

I got such a kick out of her excitement about them.  In her mind they have so many benefits - little washing, spill-ability and absolutely no ironing!

I have to say that it was so darned adorable how enchanted my mother is over these miracle pants that I decided to let her send me the catalog so I can (get this) pick out 5 pairs of my own that she wants to buy me!

Now here’s the funny part - when I told my niece Devon about this, we laughed until we nearly peed ourselves.  We started making up funny stories about these miracle pants and all the things that they can do.  So we decided that in addition to the no ironing, the spill factor and the many lovely colors, these pants can also provide these benefits:

  1. if you happen to be walking by a burning building and you are wearing these pants, go ahead and go inside because they are completely fire proof!
  2. if you should cut yourself and are being rushed to the emergency room, there is no need to worry about the wound, just wrap your pants around it and they will cauterize it immediately.
  3. got a bad ex-husband lingering around?  These pants will get rid of him in a jiffy, need I say why?
  4. don’t have time to change between work and night life?  These pants can go from a full day at the office to a night of disco dancing with a simple change of shoes.  Note that I say disco dancing as they will probably not be suitable for any other type of dancing.
  5. do you need to sharpen your kitchen knives but don’t know where to take them?  Worry no more, you can sharpen them right on your pants - they are just like stainless steel.  Just be careful of your leg underneath.

Now these are just some of the many benefits of these miracle pants and as I said earlier, they are only $5 a pair.  But what I am thinking of doing is buying them up in bulk and offering them on my website for an amazing deal of $7.50 a pair (let me know if you want some).  I might as well turn a little profit from this amazing discovery don’t you think?slacks

I just love the idea of wearing my miracle pants around town and watching people turn their heads to wonder if I have just stepped out of the movie “Staying Alive” (remember with John Travolta?).

I have offered to wear these pants to my nieces college graduation.  Remember they won’t wrinkle in my suitcase.  She however has threatened to kill me if I do.  Young people are so ungrateful these days, they just don’t get the beauty of things like miracle pants like these.

Ahh, the beauty of the days of old, when pants were only $5 and had so many multiple uses.  My mother lives happily in days of yore and I’m happy for her and her lilac, ruby and brown miracle pants.

Aren’t you curious to find out what colors I get and where I wear them?  Stay tuned or put in your vote for which uses of the miracle pants you’d like to see me use them for.

Yours in wearing the pants that can change the world,

Annie

[Post to Twitter] Tweet This Post 

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

I’m Unwrapped For Christmas

December 14, 2009

body-wrapping-3_big1Good news folks.  I’m unwrapped for Christmas. Before you jump the gun and think hey did she get lucky? It’s not what you think.

I’ve unloaded the usual packaging that I wrap myself in this time of year.  You know all of that unnecessary strain, stress and expectations that we place on ourselves this time of year?  I’ve shed all of that. Woo-hoo!  I’m free. Free to experience this day as it wants to be.

I realized that I don’t need to make a big deal out of it.  Miss Sweetie (mini dachshund) and I are going to pass a nice quiet Christmas with our Tofurkey roast.  That should be enough to keep us warm and nourished.tofurkey

A Tofurkey roast? What’s that you ask.  It’s some kind of tofu concoction that looked so good on the box that I couldn’t resist.  It’s probably awful and Miss S and I will need to dump it in the trash, but I wanted to have an adventure so I bought it.  I’ve got pasta on hand in case it’s inedible…don’t worry.

But since I’m unwrapped for Christmas, that means that I’m FREE to do anything I want - including eat a fake turkey.  I’m not sure I like it.  Even though I’m a vegetarian, I don’t really like tofu.

But fun and freedom is the name of the game.  Being unwrapped means that Christmas doesn’t have to be any of the things that it usually means to me. That way I don’t have to feel sad, lonely or sorry for myself (boo hoo) that I’m not going to visit my family this year.  Nope that’s not a useful state of mind.  So I’ve left that behind and am open to discover what this day wants to bring me.

At the very least it will be an experiment in living. I’ll let you know.

Yours in accepting everything life has to offer,

Annie

[Post to Twitter] Tweet This Post 

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

The Holy Horror Days: Ready, Set, Go CRAZY!

December 6, 2009

screamingAlright let’s get real here.  They are not Holi-days (Holy-days), they are  Holy Horror Days.

I don’t know about you but I find this time of year very difficult and very painful.  If you ask me the world has gone crazy and no one is stopping it.  Come early November, I start getting that feeling of oh no here it comes feeling. It begins with one of my favorite radio stations insisting that I would like to hear Christmas carols 24 hours a day from early November until December 26th.

I would not.

I don’t like Christmas carols all that much.  I never did and I certainly don’t want to hear them 24 hours a day for almost 6 weeks.  What are they thinking?  I used to like them long ago back in the dark ages of my childhood.  I never heard them on the radio then.  We sang them outloud. Believe it or not we actually went around the neighborhood to people’s

houses and sang for them.  The concept of sharing was beautiful.  I loved that.

panicNow we are bombarded with those once holy songs that have become tiny missiles of the constant reminder to BUY, BUY, BUY.  That is the purpose of Christmas carols on the radio these days.  They are meant to whip us into a frenzy of holiday insanity.  Hate that!

Then there is the fact that starting early December I have to drive 10 miles out of my way to avoid any malls.  Why?  Because God forbid I would be near one when someone was on their way to purchase that giant screen TV that is on sale for only 24 hours. I might get run over just being in the vicinity.  People need their electronics this time of year, especially if they are on sale.

Which also makes me completely sure that we have gone insane.  We are actually killing ourselves to get up at 4 am on black Friday so that we can save $1000 on a TV.  Some actually told me that he did this the other day.  I was shocked.  I wanted to say, “Would you like to help me save you another thousand and I’ll throw in your peace of mind for free?”  DON’T buy that TV at all.  Do you really need it?

But I’m pretty sure that come this time of year, my old fashioned, peace-loving values are the ones that would be seen as crazy, not getting up at 3 am to shell out a ton of credit, because we can be sure no one uses cash anymore.  That is only for people who have truly gone out of their minds.  A nostalgic reminder of days of old.

rage-against-machineI am goddman F _ _ _ ing determinded to keep my peace of mind this time of year no matter what!  See how riled up and angry I get?  Just just thinking about it makes me irrritable, yikes!  But honestly, I really have to push against this tidal wave of consumer insanity run rampant.  Since the world has gone insane in these ways, I my try my best to do the opposite:

1. Since people become rude and agressive - I try to be kinder and extra thoughtful,
2. As consumerism runs amok - I try to simplify
3. When things get noiser and more hectic - I try to slow down, go inside and keep things quiet.

My Personal Goals for the Holy-Days are:

1. keep peace of mind and heart
2. be kind to others
3. do the opposite of what the world is doing

To do this I need to:
1. avoid all malls and large shopping areas whenever possible.
2. turn off the radio whenever the hyper commercials come on.
3. pray more than I usually do for the sanity of the world and for the strength to endure.
4. be kinder and more helpful to others than I normally strive to be.
5. do something completely different like go to a cabin in the woods and meditate for 4 days.

What about you?  Are you ready for the Holy Days of Insanity to arrive?  If you are reading this and going, - Yeh I’m totally caught up in the whirlwind, then maybe you want to stop right now and reevaluate.

be-kind-rewindBut don’t worry about me.  I’m completely outiftted to pass through these holidays noise and frenzy free.  How about you?  Let me know how you’re fare.

Yours in the spirit of happiness, holiness and love,

Annie

[Post to Twitter] Tweet This Post 

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

If You Need To Kick Some A_s, You Need the Right Shoes

November 15, 2009

shoesHere’s the deal that no one ever told you, well no one ever told me anyway - if you need to kick some ass in this world, you need the right shoes.

Years ago I was doing some consulting work for a small family trucking business. Boy that was tough! It was a predominantly male environment and as you can imagine, my more female style of doing business didn’t really fit in.  I a fish out of water! But I am feisty, fiery and oh did I mention hard headed? So I persisted.

One day I was running a meeting for the major players in the business which consisted of about eight men and two women. We were having a meeting, which I was supposedly leading, when all of a sudden a shouting match erupted between the CEO and his head salesman.

walrussLike two bull walruses, they stood up and started tusking each other full force with their words. They were shouting and screaming and I thought, “Oh my god, what am I supposed to do about this?” I had never encountered this before in my work.

One thing you should know behind the scenes is that before this fight had broken out, I had taken off my shoes under the table. I am 4 ft, 11 inches small and in order to look more like an adult than a child when I sit in a chair, I usually take off my shoes and sit with my feet up. Most of the time no one knows about this. It’s my own personal secret to success. But this day being shoeless was not to my advantage.

When the fight broke out I was furious. I thought to myself, “How dare these two idiots interrupt my meeting!” Who do they think they are?  One of them was the owner of the company, but I didn’t care.  I was pissed.

shut-upBefore my logical brain could give me advice, I jumped up and screamed at the top of my lungs, “Shuuuutt Up!” There was dead silence in the room and then everyone turned to look at me. The CEO and the salesman stopped fighting for a minute, then the meeting went on. But less than five minutes later, the fighting broke out again.

Now I was beyond fury, I was in the kick-butt zone. I jumped up out of my seat  and ran towards the two fighting men. I put my tiny frame body right in front of Mr. CEO and faced off with Mr. Salesman and shouted at the top of my lungs, “If you don’t stop fighting right now, I’m leaving.”

The only problem was that if I left, I would be walking out without my shoes.  I had left them under the table!  Thank god they stopped fighting and I was able to go back to my seat and continue the meeting. Later someone in the group that had noticed that I was shoeless said to me, “Were you really going to leave without your shoes?”  Yes I was gonna walk out, but boy would my feet have been cold!

So here’s the learning particularly for women - If you’re out there working in the world and times get tough….when you know you need to cut the crap and kick some you know what….then you really need to have the right shoes.

kick-ass-shoesLater several of the men sidled up to me on their own and said, “Wow, you’re  tough.”  I knew that was my sign that as a small but feisty woman, I had proved my metal.  But next time I need to break up a fight, I’m going to be prepared.  I’m going to wear a nice spike heel, just in case.  If you need to kick some “you-know-what” in this world, you definitely need the right pair of shoes!

Let me know what you think about these.  :>)

I’m Annie Hart and I tell stories that change the world and I tell them raw and real because that’s not only what the world needs, but what the world is ready to hear.

[Post to Twitter] Tweet This Post 

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

A Story From My Sister - ‘You hit a what?’

November 11, 2009

ODD Elephant SideswipedAn elephant that escaped from the Family Fun Circus at the Garfield County Fairgrounds after being spooked caused a vehicle accident Wednesday night as it ran along U.S. 81 bypass in Enid, Okla. According to Enid Police Department Sgt. Billy Varney, the couple in the vehicle were not injured. The elephant suffered a broken tusk, a hurt leg and bumps, bruises and scratches, he said.

OKLAHOMA CITY (from the Associated Press)- It’s not unusual to see a deer or a cow crossing Oklahoma’s rural highways. But an elephant? An Oklahoma couple driving home from church nearly slammed into a giant pachyderm that had escaped from a nearby circus late Wednesday.

“Didn’t have time to hit the brakes. The elephant blended in with the road,” driver Bill Carpenter said Thursday. “At the very last second I said ‘elephant!’”

Carpenter, 68, said he swerved his SUV at the last second and ended up sideswiping the 29-year-old female Asian elephant on U.S. 81 in Enid, about 80 miles north of Oklahoma City.

“So help me Hanna, had I hit that elephant, not swerved, it would have knocked it off its legs, and it would have landed right on top of us,” he said. “We’d have been history.”

The couple, who own a wheat farm, weren’t injured. But the 8-foot, 4,500-pound elephant was being examined Thursday for a broken tusk and a leg wound. A local veterinarian said it appeared to have escaped major injury.

“I thought this can’t be happening. Out here you could hit a deer or a cow, but this can’t be happening. The good Lord was with us,” Carpenter said. The elephant’s tusk punched through the side of the SUV, tearing up sheet metal.

After sideswiping the elephant, his wife, Deena, flagged some people down and used their cell phone to call police.

“The dispatcher didn’t believe her: ‘You hit a what?’” he said. “I told my wife, I don’t know whether to cry or laugh.”

Enid veterinarian Dr. Dwight Olson said the elephant was hiding in some bushes just off the highway when he arrived shortly after the accident. Handlers from the circus were able to calm it down, and Olson cleaned the leg wound and gave it some pain killer.

The elephant was taken Thursday to the veterinary school at Oklahoma State University for a follow-up exam.  “I don’t believe there’s a broken bone, but I don’t have an X-ray room big enough to examine it,” Olson said.

The elephant had escaped from the Family Fun Circus at the Garfield County Fairgrounds earlier Wednesday after something spooked it while it was being loaded into a truck with another elephant, Olson said.

A booking agent for the circus, Rachael Bellman, said she was unaware the incident, and a telephone message left with circus officials wasn’t immediately returned.

Carpenter joked about being involved in such a bizarre accident on what is usually a peaceful church night.  “I don’t know what was in the wine, but it must have been pretty strong,” he said.

Annie’s Note: my sister Lisa and her family live 30 miles from here and while they regularly see coyote, armadillos and other wildlife, I think this is the first elephant!   Good news update from my sister: “They sent the elephant off to Oklahoma State University where they have a vet school.  I bet the students were beyond excited to get an elephant to work on instead of the usual cows and horses!”

[Post to Twitter] Tweet This Post 

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

Alberto and How Stories Warm the Heart

October 21, 2009

heart-bottlesToday I shared a story from my life , one that I use story to warm the heart and change perception.

I told the Story about how Alberto and I joke about getting married.  I want to be sure that you know that I am not truly desperate enough to run off to Morocco to marry Alberto!  I love Alberto but we are not desperate.  We are simply using our story to make lightness out of being single at fifty.

On of the ways that I use story is the ability to step into another world and change how you feel and act. This story allows us to create a different reality.  Instead of feeling sad or alone, we have a story together in which we feel loved and cared for.

It is a wonderful story that we have used for many years.  We laugh about it every time we speak.  Sometimes I’m laughing so hard that I feel like my sides will split.  This story is like nourishing good food that keeps our hearts happy and healthy.

I got alot of comments today about the story.  There were quite a few belly laughs, a few were wondering if I was truly getting married.  And my favorite result was that Alberto’s elderly parents laughed like little children.  They have known me since I was twenty-five and they know how much I care for Alberto.  Alberto has featured in several of my stories because he is a symbol of  philos for me,which is defined as ‘brotherly love’ but it is much more than that.

heart-warming-storiesNow for those of you that were really thinking I might be heading off to Morocco to marry - don’t worry.  I was frivolous in my youth but I’m not heading in that direction currently.  I will let you know when that wonderful day does arrive.

In the meantime I hope this story has shown how stories can help you live happy and healthy inside of realities that warm the heart.

[Post to Twitter] Tweet This Post 

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

Good News Story: I May Be Getting Married

October 20, 2009

me-albertoGood news folks, I may be getting married.  I know that may seem sudden for those of you who have been reading my blog because only a month ago I was sobbing into my hankie about a painful breakup.  So I imagine you’re wondering who this potential groom is and how I met him so quickly?

The answer is that I have known him for over twenty-five years.  I met my wonderful Alberto in October of 1984 in Portland, Oregon, while I was studying Italian in college and he was visiting the US with some friends.

Just to clarify, Alberto are not getting married not out of love, but out of, how should I say it - sheer desperation.  That sounds reasonable doesn’t it?  Too many people get married for love and then when it goes awry, it’s a big mess.   Although Alberto and I care for each other,we would not actually choose each other to marry.

But at age 50 we are finally getting smart.  We made a pact many years ago, that if we were still single at fifty, we would marry each other.  We were only kidding.  It sounded funny back then.  We never actually believed that either of us would still be single.  But here we are.  What to do now but follow through right?

I asked him today, “Alberto would you have every thought when we met twenty-five years ago, that we’d still both be single today?” He said, “Annie at least you were married once.  I’ve never even done that.” I told him to hurry up and marry someone, so at least he’d have that milestone under his belt.

best-dressNow for the practicalities of all of this.  For this idea is nothing if not practical.  I asked him if I should get ready for the wedding  and he said, Si preparati, which means Yes make preparations.  So then I asked What kind of dress would you imagine me in - a long one or a short one?

I needed to have a practical sense of what I’ll be wearing.  See everything about this is very practical.  I want you to notice this because love has always been something that has had a lot of emotion and very little practicality.  I want to make sure that you see how much I have grown and how mature I am.

heelsAlberto imagined me in a short dress, very short he said.  I did too.  Not because that would normally be my style, but because at age fifty, we need to rev things up a bit.  I told him that I’d probably wear four inch heels that are so high he’d have to carry me.  He said something incomprehensible in Italian about this.

Alberto and I have a great love and respect for each other, but we are not getting married for love or respect.  We are desperate and that’s that.  We are doing this so we can both sleep at night knowing that we won’t be alone in the world.

Where will we live?, I asked.   Anywhere but my town (in Italy) or your town (in the US), he said.  Maybe we could go to Morocco (his idea) or Costa Rica (my idea)?   We decided that we would live anywhere, but where we are now.

So that’s it folks, I may be having a big adventure in my future.  Since I have known Alberto for twenty-five years I’m pretty sure that there won’t be too many surprises.  We’re already clear that we can’t actually live together.  We’ll just be married, not actually stay in the same house.

alberto-beardHere is a list of Alberto’s worst traits:

1.  He’s really stubborn.
2.  He’s really hard headed.
3.  He’s obstinate.
4.  He’s really stubborn.  Oh I already said that.

Great thing is they happen to coincide with my worst traits which are:

  1. I’m really stubborn.zizzi-cropped
  2. I’m hard headed.
  3. I’m obstinate.
  4. I always know best.

That is why I know we are absolutely the best choice for each other.  Or at least in this case, we’re possibly the only choice for each other.  Well, like I said, at least we won’t end up alone.  We’ve got that covered.

Let me know your vote - should Alberto and I marry or not?

By the way, if you are enjoying reading my stories, and would like to receive them in your email box, click here.

[Post to Twitter] Tweet This Post 

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

Dating Over Fifty, It’s A Jungle Out There

September 29, 2009

tacky-manI don’t mean to scare you folks but if you’re single and over fifty - IT’S A JUNGLE OUT THERE!

I’m trying not to be paranoid about it.  I’m just trying to be real.  Dating is a pretty scary endeavor at this age, let’s face it.  Somehow the rules have changed from when I was twenty five and no one let me know about it.

Dating at fifty feels more like buying a used car from one of those tacky car salesmen, than shopping at Tiffany’s.  And though I’m not really sure what to do about it, whenever I’m in doubt about anything, I tell stories.

So here is another Raw & Real Story about the realities of dating when you’re over fifty.  After reading this, you’ll either be really really happy that you’re already married or you’ll want to join a convent or the priesthood if you’re single.

Just kidding.  Keep the hope folks. No matter what we must stay open to love, even if the pickin’s are very slim.

So I was having dinner the other night with my niece Devon, her boyfriend Mitchell and my former brother-in-law Jim.  Jim was telling us stories about his adventures in dating or not-dating as the case may be.  Jim is filing suit with his doctor for negligence in a medical case and he had to call the office to talk to the receptionist and it seems like somewhere along the way, she developed a big crush on him. texting

When he finally met her in person, she happens to weigh over 300 pounds.  Now I’m not trying to be a weightist here but that is well outside of the normal range.  She also has several children who sound like derelicts and an ex-husband who is a former drug addict?  I know it sounds like I’m being  very judgemental here but I’m pretty sure you would have been thinking the exact same thing if you’d heard the story.   To make matters worse, she texts him every day saying things like “Good morning, I hope you’re having a good day!”

Eeek!  I wanted to say, “Run Jim run!” But then I got to thinking about my own experiences with dating and realized that mine haven’t been much better.  So who am I to tell him what to do?  Besides he can’t really cut off contact with her because he needs her to help him get his medical records.  So what is a man to do but just receive those strange text messages and do the best with what life is sending his way?  There’s no perfect situation after fifty.  If he gets ready to marry her however, I will take a stand.  My nieces are at stake at that point.

So what are we to do about this crazy world of dating over fifty?  I don’t want to say that the pickins are slim, but they really are.  Some might believe that anyone who is left unmarried at this point, has a very good reason for being single.

Part of me believes this and has actual evidence to prove it.  But part of me doesn’t want to believe it because my own future is at stake.  If I believe that the only cars available at this point are the used ones with damage that’s been painted over, then I’m probably not going very far down the road of life right?   And if it really is true, then I might as well just head on over to the nunnery right now.

No I’m not going to do that.  I’m not going to give in to fear or cynicism just because all the evidence is pointing in this direction.  In fact I’m going to do exactly the opposite and line up some dates for myself right now.  So here are my picks for this week.  Let me know what you think.  Don’t just base your choices on appearance though.  Looks are deceiving and both of these men are obviously very charming and dashing. See if you can see deeper than that though.  Then go ahead and vote.

Put your votes in now for my date of the week:

dark-tacky-manfat-tacky-manWill it be Date #1 the Wholesale Shoe Salesman?

Or Date #2 the Former Mr Italian Universe??

It’s a tough choice isn’t it?

But I’m going to leave the choosing up to you.  You tell me who to date and why you picked him and I promise to give you the full story of our date raw and real.

Well let’s review our lessons:

  1. If you’re married, be grateful
  2. If you’re single, well….get ready.

I hope you’re enjoying the raw and real stories.  This is the way life really is and since somebody ought to tell the truth, it might as well be me.

Yours in story,

Annie

[Post to Twitter] Tweet This Post 

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

Next Page »